Dating can be expensive. Between paying for a nice meal for two, new clothing, and other activities, it can easily add up to more than £100 per date. Most people simply can’t afford this, especially if they are trying to find the right person by dating more than one person. There are several ideas that will help you save quite a bit of money without making you look cheap.
Dinner has traditionally been the most popular date to take someone on. Unfortunately, this is also not cheap. You can skip dinner entirely though and still have a great time. Meeting up for coffee and desert at a local pastry shop will only run you around £10, and will still give you face to face time to get to know each other. If the weather permits, think about a picnic as a meal instead. A hand packed dinner under the stars is going to be seen as much more romantic than a restaurant, and it won’t cost you a ton of money to set up.
If it isn’t your first date, staying in can be a great way to enjoy each others company without spending a lot of money. Preparing a home cooked meal is a gesture that is inexpensive and will be much more appreciated than a restaurant meal. Even a take away can be great, and cheap if you know where to look. Grab some board or card games and rent a few movies. This can be a great way to have fun without hurting your wallet.
As technology advances, many more options open up for the dating world. Many people will try to pack as much information in to their profile as possible. If you don’t understand the terminology, you may be setting yourself up for an experience you’d rather not have. Here are a few of the more common terms, and what they mean.
Abundant Love – This is another way of saying they don’t want to be exclusive. A profile that uses this term is likely to be a swinger, or someone just interested in sex.
Casual Dating – The person who uses this term in their profile is likely looking for a few people to go out with on occasion. This can lead to something more serious later, but they aren’t looking for serious right now.
Friends with Benefits – This is a way of saying they want someone to hang out with, and have sex with, with no commitment or relationship.
May December Relationship – This refers to a couple with a large difference between their ages. Other terms have taken the place of this, but you may still run in to people who use this.
Cougar – An older woman looking for a younger man.
No Strings Attached – This is the same thing as friends with benefits.
Open Relationship - A relationship in which both people are able to have sex with others. This is common for profiles of swingers, or those who don’t want to get tied down with a single person.
Pansexual – This term is used to describe people who see beyond gender. Unlike bisexuals, they are attracted to men and women, as well as open to the possibility of transgendered people.
There is more to swinging than just sex. While many people assume the swinging lifestyle is only about sex, this couldn’t be farther from the truth. Being involved in a swinging lifestyle is just as much about community as it is sex.
Those in the community will enjoy meeting friends who share the same values and concepts. It’s nice to have friends who understand who you are and are accepting of it. Swingers can get together without having sex, and just enjoy each others company.
Swinging clubs are available all over the world. Most of the clubs require a membership simply for safety reasons, but this shouldn’t deter swingers from joining. The clubs are a great place to socialize with other swingers. While many clubs do host on premise parties where sex is allowed, most will also have sex free areas where people can just chat and have a few drinks. This is no different than a book club meeting or going bowling with your buddies. It’s always great to meet others of a like mind.
Limited Social Outside
Since swinging is still very much a lifestyle that isn’t understood, many swingers have a hard time finding friends outside of the community. Because of this, the friendships formed at clubs and parties tend to be very close friendships that can last for years. It’s not uncommon to find couples who have been swinging with the same couples for more than a decade. The bonds are strong.
While you may not be able to go out and purchase a car simply for dating purposes, you may be able to rent a car. There are some cars that just scream run, or bad date. Here are a few things to consider before picking up your date.
Best Car Choices
A simple, comfortable vehicle is all that’s required. Don’t get to showy with your vehicle, and avoid bringing the family van. A decent sedan, or small SUV is your best choice. Remember to have your car cleaned, and a detail is a nice touch. If all you have is the large mini-van or a super sporty car, consider renting a car for the evening instead.
It’s also vital that you make sure your car is reliable. Nothing is worse than being on a date and getting stranded because the car craps out. It’s not a bad idea to have a basic service done before any big date to avoid this. If you can’t do this, at least have reliable roadside assistance just in case.
What To Avoid
Some cars will scream ‘run away’ before you’ve even had a chance to put your best foot forward. Towncars are typically poor choices since they look like cabs. Cars that are designed for super high performance driving (think high end luxury sports cars) are difficult to get in and out of. You may make a bad impression if you show up in a gas guzzler and your date is an environmentalist. Also avoid showing up in a vehicle that looks like you are trying to show how wealthy you are. These all leave bad impressions, and you may not get a second date, if the date even gets in the car for the first one!
Having sex at work is a fantasy for many people. It can also lead to big trouble, anything from getting fired to being sued. If you must have sex at work, here are some basic precautions and the best places to try it.
Many offices now employ security cameras to keep employees and sensitive information safe. Before you decide to get frisky at work you need to know where these cameras are. Spend some time doing research so you can pinpoint the locations. Safe places with no cameras are usually toilets and executive offices.
Check The Parking Lot
If everyone at the office leaves at the same time, you will need to leave and come back as to not arouse suspicion. If the parking lot employs a security patrol or has cameras, this may not work. You may be able to sneak around patrol by parking nearby and sneaking back in with a key later.
Why You Should Rethink This
Everyday the news has stories about people getting caught having sex in the office and being sued for harassment or inappropriate behavior. Even if you both consent, if someone were to walk in and find you they could consider it offensive and you could end up being arrested. Many companies now use cameras for security that aren’t easily seen. You may think you’re in a safe place, but end up being caught on camera anyhow. Unless you are independently wealthy, you probably need your job. Being fired for having sex is embarrassing, and you won’t want that on your resume. It’s really not a good idea, so you probably shouldn’t do this.
Having a few drinks on a date can help ease tensions and allow you to open up. It’s common for people to order a couple of cocktails or glasses of wine during a dinner. There is a line though, and crossing this can result in dating disaster. Here’s what you should know.
Understand Your Tolerance
If you don’t drink often, a single glass of wine or one cocktail may put you over the edge. On the other hand, heavy drinkers may be able to knock back an entire bottle of wine and still feel in control. Before you go out take a minute to think about this.
Know What To Order
Getting drunk is never a good idea on a date. You need to stay on your toes and be able to have a decent conversation. Everyone is different when they’ve had too much to drink, and it’s usually never a good situation.
If you are a lightweight and know it, stick to a single glass of wine at dinner. Order a glass of ice water along with it. This way you can slowly sip on the glass of wine throughout the meal without putting yourself over the edge. Turn down the second glass, even if your date insists.
If you drink more often and can handle a large amount of alcohol, understand what your date may think of you if you down an entire bottle or 6 cocktails. Try to stick to no more than one drink per hour on your date. This should be the general rule for the first several dates. Going more than this can make you look like an alcoholic, and may be a turn off.
For some people dating the boss will fulfill desires of dating someone in a position of authority. Others may just really like their boss and want to pursue a relationship. If you decide you want to try to start a relationship with your boss, here’s what you should know.
Check The Handbook
Many companies have strict policies about people dating while working together. You may have to transfer out to another department before you can go out with your boss. Even if you think you can be discreet, it’s not a good idea to break policy to go on a date. Chances are neither of your jobs are worth losing over a few dates.
Know How To Ask
It’s not a good idea to ask your boss out in a team meeting. You should also not try to seduce them during work hours. If dating is not against policy, wait until there is no one else around and the environment is relaxed. Simply ask how they feel about dating a co-worker. If they are open, then tell them you are attracted to them and would like to go out sometime. If they say no, you have to be prepared to walk away as if nothing has happened.
Understand that you will need to keep your relationship separate from your work. This means during work hours they are your boss first. You may get reprimanded, written up, and ordered around. Don’t expect this to change simply because you’ve gone on a few dates.
Dating a swinger can open new doors to your sex life. Many people assume that swinging is a deviant lifestyle that is dark and swank. This really isn’t the case. Swingers can lead perfectly normal lives, they just enjoy sharing their sexuality with others. If you’ve started dating someone who is a swinger, here are some things you should be aware of to make it a good experience.
Swingers don’t go out and sleep with other couples every night of the week. They can have sex with their partner without needing anyone else in the room. The lifestyle is about sexual expression and openness, not sexual deviance.
Rules And Guidelines
If you’ve agreed to try swinging with your partner, the first thing your partner should ask is for a list of things that are off limits. This list of rules will be different for every couple. You may be okay with others watching and participating in groups, but not be okay with your partner going off alone with someone else. Whatever you are not comfortable with should be brought up before it becomes an issue. The rules will change over time as you both experience new things.
Just because you go to a swingers club or party doesn’t mean you are expected to have sex with different people. In fact, you don’t even have to have sex with your partner. Swingers are very open and understand that you may enjoy watching, or just want to see what it’s all about.
Many people are open enough to have sex on a first date. There is nothing wrong with this as long as both parties are interested. The trick is finding out if your date is interested in this without coming across as too forward or creepy. Here’s what you should know.
During the date you should have ample time to get to know the other person. If the conversation seems to be going towards a more sexual or more teasing direction, this person may be open to having sex on the first date. Listen to what they say, watch their body language. If it seems to be a more sensual gesture, match it and wait for a reaction. If your date seems standoffish, and avoids the subject of sex, then don’t bother asking. Chances are good they won’t take kindly to your advances after just one date.
You Shouldn’t Have to Ask
As the evening wraps up, take your date home- as in see them to their door. Go in for the classic kiss, and see what happens. If they invite you in, then go for it. Have another drink, talk some more, and just see where things go. It’s really not a good idea to come right out and ask for sex at any time, especially on the first date. If it happens naturally, perfect. If you have to ask for it, the answer will be no. You also probably won’t get a second date, and will have to go through all of that again. Remember the adage ‘the best things in life are worth waiting for’. Sex is absolutely one of these things.
Dating or sleeping with people you work with can be a bad idea. Even if the temptation is strong, there are several things you should think about before you do this.
Many companies have policies that prohibit coworkers from fraternizing. These kinds of policies can be found in the smallest family run businesses to large corporations. There is always a good reason for this. If one person ends up getting promoted, it can lead to sticky situations. Many companies will let employees go if they find out. Check your company policy to see what rules are in place before you even consider dating a co-worker.
Many of us are great at putting on one mask for work, and another for home. The most professional person at work can be a complete slacker and slob at home. The quiet one can be a huge gossip. When you meet people at work and only see them at work, you are only seeing one side of them, and it’s typically not the side that matters. This can lead to nasty break ups later, making office politics difficult.
Speaking of office politics, this is another reason it’s not a good idea to date someone you work with. If it doesn’t go well, you run the risk of becoming the topic of water cooler discussions. If you don’t want everyone in the office to know all of your business, then you should keep work and social activities separate. It’s also going to be hard to be taken seriously if the rumor mill gets started.